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Breaking up is very difficult to do, especially if the break up was unexpected. Sometimes you have no control over a break up. All you can do is accept it and move on.
However, accepting a breakup and moving on is much easier said than done. Change is never easy, even when it’s a welcome change and seldom is breaking up considered a welcome change. It is possible to accept a break up and move on once you set your mind to it.
When your break up is new, you’re going to feel depressed and not want to do much socializing. This is perfectly normal. You’ve lost someone that was an important part of your life and you can’t expect to bounce back immediately, regardless of what some people may tell you.
Yes, I know the old “get back in the saddle routine”, but if you’re preoccupied and not paying attention when you jump back on the saddle, you’re very likely to be thrown right off the damn horse again!
Don’t be afraid to take a little time to yourself. I’m not saying to hibernate and avoid other people – quite the opposite, in fact. When we’re in a relationship, we’re spending so much time with our significant other that we tend to forget the many interests we may have. We just don’t seem to have time to ourselves to do these things. After a break up, it’s a good time to start doing those things again.
Speaking of your friends, your friends and family may make it harder for you to accept the break up and move on, especially if they liked your ex and liked you as a couple. They’re bound to be a lot of questions. It may seem as though their questions about your ex and the breakup will never end.
You may have to explain to them that as unfortunate as they may find it, the relationship is over; and you’ve accept it and is trying to move on and would appreciate not having her name brought up constantly. Hopefully, they’ll understand and more than likely will cooperate.
As difficult as you may find it with your family, it’s probably going to be worse with your friends, especially if they are friends you and your ex had together. You may find that you’re not comfortable with them and vice versa. Take it slow and give them time to accept that you’re still the same person only without your ex by your side. You may find that some of these friendships will never be the same. Rest assured, though, that you’ll make new friends now that you’re starting over in your life.
It may just be the perfect time to become involved in a new sport or activity or take a vacation with a friend – a friend unfamiliar with your break up.
Remember to keep yourself busy. The more you keep yourself occupied, the quicker and easier it will be to accept the break up and move on. Trust me, take your time, be patient – there is a whole lot out there and better awaiting you!
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